Sunday, November 2, 2008

It's the Circle of Thwartage!

I hate being thwarted! All day, lurking around every corner, has been a thwart-worthy event and I have HAD it!

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Cooking pancakes today, the first one stuck to the pan. I took the spatula and proceeded to try to peel it up, but to no avail. In fact, not only did I not get an avail (is that the right way to say that? I never know...) but the pancake was destroyed in the process and the leading edge of a brand-new plastic spatula was melted! AAGHHH! Thwarted!

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So I decided to go to the store to get a metal spatula. Naturally, in the process, I saw about four hundred other things I absolutely HAD to have because I went to the store hungry because my pancakes were ruined and I needed a new spatula!

$85 later, I leave the store. Yes, I remembered the metal spatula (eventually!) but I also remembered taco meat, hot sauce, kitchen knives, sandwich meat and any number of other things I would never have had to spend money on if only I had not been thwarted by the accursed pancakes! AAGHHH! Thwarted again!

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Next, I left the store. Or rather, I tried to. Oh, I got out of the store all right. I even got into my car (not actually my car, but that's a thwart-worthy story for another day!) and pulled out of my space. I got in line behind two other cars waiting to turn left into traffic. And waiting. And waiting some more.

Turns out that the person at the front of the line had stalled out and couldn't move! So there I am, sandwiched between vehicles, trapped; like a rat in a PT Cruiser. GRRR! Thwarted Again!!

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Eventually, the three or four cars stacked up behind me got frustrated and, backing dangerously into the busy parking lot, they turned around and went to another exit. This freed me to do the same (only safer!) and I moved over to another exit to the right of where I had just been sitting for ten minutes. Just as I turned left, into traffic and on my way home, the stalled truck started up and, pulling in front of me, stalled again! OONGAWA!!! Thwarted once more!

Finally the truck drifted off to the side of the road, out of traffic, and I was able to continue home. What a relief!

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Remember when I said I bought "any number of other things" while I was at the store because of the vicious thwarting I received at the hands of my pancakes? Go back and look; I'll wait...

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Got it? Good. Well, one of the things I bought was a DVD. Now, Chica and I are living in somewhat austere conditions right now as we transition from England to Arizona, and await the arrival of our stuff. So the only entertainment device we currently have is my (VERY OLD) laptop. Still, it can be cozy to snuggle up and watch a movie on the small (seriously, this thing is SMALL and OLD!) screen. But, naturally, my DVD playing software doesn't work because the trial period has expired (I refuse to spend money just to watch a DVD on my own computer!). YYAARRRRGGGHH!! Thwarted!

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So off I go, searching the Interweb for more free dvd player software. As an IT professional of sixteen years, this should be simple for me, right? My collegues would all tell you it should be a piece of cake.

I downloaded two non-working programs, one that requires purchase to hear the audio track, a Trojan Horse, and a second copy of the one that stopped working in the first place! NNNNGGHGHGH!!!!! More thwarting! Chica even suggested I call one of her Reserve coworkers in NEBRASKA for help! Multiple Twartage!!!!!

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So here I am, writing a blog about being thwarted. I get it. Some days, you thwart, and other days you get thwarted. I know when I'm licked. Now I just have to switch over to the last thing I downloaded so hopefully I can watch my movie in peace. Boy, I really hope this one works; it cost me $14.95.

Don't tell Chica!



-Sage Words

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I won't tell. I think I understand the thwartee point of view (see my old blog on RV repair), and sympathize.
-Geezerguy

Anonymous said...

Ah, thwartage. I don't call it that, I call it something else.

So, Sage, you know me well enough to know that I feel my entire life is one big thwart after another you can read about my latest thwarting here.